Not having an amazing experience at college? You're not alone.
One university attendee passed the majority of his freshers' week looking at digital networks, viewing updates about other students' fun nights out.
"I stayed indoors," Robert recalls, depicting those days as the most solitary phase of his life.
His housemates rarely went out, and his course didn't feel particularly social.
Although he tried by participating in sample activities for various societies, he didn't discover his people.
"I began losing my self-esteem," he says. "It seemed that people didn't want to form friendships with me, or they didn't like me."
Social Media Comparisons
Initially, Robert had no intention of attending college and received employment offers for following college.
Yet he observed his peers having great fun as college students online.
"When you must rise for work on Thursday at nine in the morning and you observe peers partied on the previous evening, you begin believing situations appear superior," Robert says.
Higher Education Assumptions
Media content and social media can glorify the idea of student life.
Numerous students begin university with high expectations for what they imagine could be the most wonderful time of their lives.
Some students arrive at college with "rose-tinted glasses," notes a counselling manager.
Research Results
- Through surveys of new students initially, the main anxiety was fitting in and being accepted
- Further studies through polling organizations, nearly one-fifth of attendees said they lacked friendships at university
- A substantial portion mentioned they felt anxious regularly about forming friendships
Individual Stories
A different attendee's social media content was full of videos of peers socializing while sharing accommodation in student houses.
Yet when she transferred from her hometown to university to study journalism, she found initial days "overwhelming" because of how much alcohol it involved.
Alisha doesn't drink and had avoided party scenes before.
"I did spend a lot of freshers' week inside my accommodation," she says. "I just felt a bit alienated."
Mental Health Considerations
In a 2025 survey of more than 10,000 university attendees, nearly one-third reported they had considered leaving university.
The main cause was psychological wellbeing, followed by financial concerns.
"Anxiety about all of these different things is very widespread, and typical," adds a counselling expert.
Finding Solutions
Eventually, all three individuals eventually adapted and developed friendships.
Alisha made friends via her studies and via social media, while another student became more content when she could to relocate with companions.
Helpful Recommendations
Regarding his experience, currently in his mid-twenties and in his last year, it was participating in theater activities and employment during studies that assisted in relationship building.
Robert's advice to first-year students experiencing connection challenges is to venture outside your living space and participate in group trial sessions.
"Subsequent to periods of consistently showing up, individuals become familiar with you," Robert says, "you become familiar with them, and relationships start developing."